Chapter 135
Chapter 135
Every time I seen it I was sick to my stomach. The constant reminder of what they had done to me. Again I scrubbed at my leg but it did nothing but make my skin red and angry. I was stuck with it, it was always going to be on my skin. Hearing a knock at the door I wiped at my eyes.
"Just a sec" He had only seen it once and the look in his eyes is one I'll never forget. I had done something I'd never done before, I'd locked the door. To ashamed in case he walked in.
"Ava why's the door locked?"
Quickly clipping my bra I pulled on a pair of sweatpants and unlocked the door. I was embarrassed, I didn't want him to look at me.
"Thought you weren't going to shut me out?" He asked walking further into the bathroom. Taking a seat on the edge of the bath he watched me closely.
"I only locked the door Blaze it's not a big deal" Pulling one of his hoodies over my head I walked back into our bedroom looking for my sneakers. "And now you're wearing my hoodie?".
"Thought you liked it when I wore your clothes?" I fired back slipping my feet into my shoes.
"Does look better on you than it does me" He smirked his eyes trailing over my body. Rolling my eyes I pulled my hair into a high pony tail. "Get showered we have to leave soon". I was trying my hardest to act normal could say I was good at faking it. My insides were crumbling, I wanted to cry every 5 minutes but I refused to be the victim. I had to put on a front, show that I could be strong when in all honesty all I wanted was the ground to swallow me up and make me disappear.
"I'll make you a fresh coffee" Turning my back on him I made my way downstairs. For the first time since we met I felt awkward around him. I didn't know how to act around him anymore. He has shown me that nothing has changed but I can't help the little voice in the back of my head telling me he'll leave me.
Hearing the roar of a bike engine my eyebrows knitted together. My stomach dropped as my thoughts went into overdrive. What if my dad got word before I could tell him? Peeking through the blind my body physically relaxed when I saw Jared demount his bike but he wasn't alone.
Pulling open the front door a Starbucks cup was pushed in my face "Went an extra 2 bucks this time" He grinned "Even got the chocolate dust on it for you and a donut". Rolling my eyes I let him and Duke in. Quickly looking around outside I closed the door and went to join them in the living room.
"VP about?" Jared asked
"He's in the shower, Jared what's in that other box?" I asked afraid that I already knew the answer.
Grinning at me he looked over at Duke who was wearing the same grin. Oh god please tell me they didn't.
"Blaze shouldn't be long tell him I already left to go to the clubhouse" Grabbing my keys and my phone I knew getting out of here on my own was going to be difficult.
"Don't think so sweetheart not on my watch. Now sit and drink your coffee" He said as he stood in front of the living room door.
"Jared" I sighed "I'm sure I can make it to the clubhouse on my own besides I'm sure you all have things to discuss".
"Ava" He sighed
I knew it was useless because I knew there was no way he'd let me leave on my own.
"Fine" I huffed for once doing as I was told. "Can you at least go check on him he's been up there for a while" It wasn't like Blaze to take this long to get ready.
Now it was awkward...
"I owe you an apology" I said breaking the awkward silence between myself and Duke.
"You don't owe me anything Ava. It's me that should be apologising to you. I never should have-..."
"It's okay" I shrugged cutting him off "Blaze is your family and you were just looking out for him. I get that now".
"But you're my family now too. I realised the day he cut ties with me that you were the real deal. I've never seen him so angry before. I never should have gotten in the way so please accept my apology".
"You saved my life" I whispered lowering my gaze to my coffee cup "If you weren't there I-...".
"Ava"....
"I will be forever grateful Duke and you will always have a place here".
"She's right" Snapping my head up my eyes landed on Blaze. "You'll always have a place here which is why I want you to come back to the club. You've been nomad for 2 years it's time to come back brother".
My hands were slick with sweat, my stomach churning at the thought of what I was about to do. We had been parked a few blocks away from the clubhouse for a good hour and I still wasn't ready to move.
Blaze hadn't said a word. He sat patiently waiting until I was ready. The thing was I didn't know if I was ever going to be ready. I had no idea how I was going to sit my dad down and tell him.
"I can't do it" I whispered squeezing my eyes tight.
"You can" Placing his hand over mine he linked our fingers together. "I'm here baby every step of the way".
Shaking my head I pulled my hand from his and pulled my knees to my chest. "How? How can I tell him what happened? It'll brake him Blaze". "What happens if he hears it from someone else because word will have spread darling and-..." Slamming his hand off the steering wheel he cursed.
Starting the engine he drove the rest
of the way to the clubhouse. I was terrified my stomach was in knots but I knew I had to tell him. A line of bikes were parked outside a few
bodies hanging around. Rumm
around in the glove box I pulled out my sunglasses and put them on. The brusing was ugly, the left side of my face swollen. I knew the minute | walked in he'd know something was wrong.
"I-is my mom there too?" I stuttered my eyes landing on Cage as he stood staring at us.
"I called a meeting everyone is about here somewhere. Once you tell him all hell will brake loose. I need the extra man power to hold him down". Shaking my head I unclipped my seatbelt. I can do this I had to do this. Taking a deep breath I opened my door and stepped out. My feet wouldn't move, my breathing started coming out faster and for the first time in my life I think I was having a panick attack.
"I got you" His arms were around me, he was shielding me with his body, protecting me. "I've always got you" He whispered the comfort of being in his arms calming my breathing and relaxing me completely.
Little did he know I couldn't do it. Everybody being here only made it worse. I had to get out of here and I had to do it fast. I couldn't face it,
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couldn't face the looks of sympathy that I was going to receive. "I need a few seconds on my own" I whispered his arms falling from my waist his hands taking a hold of mine. "Just a few seconds Blaze. I need to straighten my head before I come in".
"Take all the time you need sweets" Kissing my forehead he slipped my car keys into my hand "Remember no one will treat you any different".
Walking back to my car I wiped the
tears from my eyes. I had lied to him, straight to his face. Getting in the drivers side I watched and
waited for him and Cage to disappear inside. I knew he'd
l
be
furious that I left but I had to be by myself, I needed time to think and
accept what happened to me. Pulling my hood up I put the car into gear and left.
My phone hadn't stopped vibrating from the moment I left. He was furious alright. Having had enough I finally answered him.
"Baby I'm not angry just tell me where you are" Okay so he was more worried than furious.
"Driving around" I replied "I need time Blaze just know I'm okay and I'm safe I'll call you later" Hitting the end button I turned it off and continued down
the long stretch of road. I didn't know where I was going or where I'd end up.