19
His lips pulled into a grin. “You don’t say?”
I returned the expression, making sure my smile was wider than his. “And that sometimes causes a little bit of a problem. I don’t put out on the first date. Or the third. Or even the tenth.”
“Yeah, that’s definitely going to be a problem with Macon.”
Hannah craned her neck so our faces were close again while we both gazed at her brother. “Why? He can’t woo her a little first?” She paused, like she was waiting for a response, but didn’t get one. “Camden, not every guy in this world is like you and expects to get laid on day one.”
He laughed and pointed at us. “This little duo you’ve got going on here is similar to my friendship with Macon. I know what the dude wants, and waiting to fuck-or woo, or whatever the hell you called it-isn’t going to work for him.”
“I don’t believe it,” Hannah said, and she leaned back.
That gave me a chance to reply to his text.
ME
I want to get off in a public place. You know, in front of people, where they don’t know what’s going on and I have to kinda hide what’s happening and how I’m feeling.
“Believe it,” he replied to her. “He’s got about as much patience as me when it comes to chicks.” He held his phone while he went on, “He’s not looking to settle down. Macon Spade isn’t going to be your Prince Charming.”
CAMDEN
You’re into voyeurism? Nice. I can do that. What’s lesson three?
ME
I want to use a toy.
“Who says she’s looking for Prince Charming?” Hannah countered. “She just needs a guy who’s nice, who isn’t after the one thing she’s not ready to give away. Who will treat her with respect and-”
“That’s not Macon.” He typed and glanced up. “Didn’t you hear me? The dude isn’t looking for a relationship. He’s a player. You’re not really going to hand your best friend over to a guy who’s a wolf, like me, are you?”
Except I was ready to hand myself over to Camden.
In fact, I already had.
Oh God.
CAMDEN
Do you buy your toys at a sex shop? Or have you only bought them online?
ME
Don’t laugh … I don’t own any sex toys.
Hannah froze. “I see your point. That would be tragic.”
“You can say that again,” I whispered, and I gazed at the screen of my phone.
CAMDEN
What do you use at home?
ME
My fingers.
“But I’m not sure I believe that about Macon,” Hannah said. “I’ve hung out with him countless times. Sure, he’s a player. I can tell that by the way he smiles-he’s got that mischievous grin that girls completely die over-and the man is the definition of charming. But I get the sense that, like you, he just hasn’t found the right girl. Maybe neither of you is looking for that girl, but if she happens to fall in your lap, you’ll turn into everything she wants and more. That’s my guess.”
I was drowning in thoughts.
And they were coming from both sides-the secret conversation I was having with Camden and the one he was having with Hannah about Macon.
And how all of this was about me.
But his refusal to set me up with his best friend was definitely something I found interesting. Not that I wanted a chance with Macon. I didn’t-at all. I just didn’t know why Camden cared so much. Why it seemed like he was trying to protect me. Why he wouldn’t offer to play matchmaker, especially given that, very soon, my virginity would be a thing of the past.
CAMDEN
Your fingers … fuck me.
What about lesson four?
ME
You know when I said that I’m giving you all my firsts and I want one of yours? Something you’ve never experienced with another woman? That’s what I want for that lesson.
“Who’s to say the right girl hasn’t already fallen into my lap and I didn’t bite?” Even though he was staring at his sister, I could feel the penetration of his gaze. “Well, shit, maybe I bit, just not in the permanent sense.”
“You’re that opposed to a relationship?” Hannah pressed.
“Maybe.” He brought the drink up to his lips, glancing at me for several seconds and then at his sister. “Or maybe I just like fucking with you.”
“If I had a straw”-she searched the table-“or anything for that matter, I’d throw it at you right now.”
He took a long drink and set the glass down.
CAMDEN
Hold on. I asked you to come up with three fantasies, and you’re putting one of those on me? That wasn’t the deal.
ME
I’m not exactly putting it on you. It’s more like telling you that I’m open to anything and I want you to surprise me with something that’s going to blow my mind.
CAMDEN
I want to fuck your ass. Does that blow your mind?
“That still doesn’t answer the question about Macon,” Hannah said. “Just because you’re allergic to permanently having someone in your life-or so you say-doesn’t mean he is. I think we should put the two of them together and see what happens.”
ME
Blow my mind? No. Surprise me since it’s you? No. Freak me out? Yes. Worry like hell about it? Yesss. Camden, I’m a virgin, so you’re saying you want to do anal before you even take my virginity? That’s kind of a major step, no?
CAMDEN
You asked. I gave you my answer.
ME
But I’m trusting you to lead me, Camden. Is that really the right direction to take me in?
CAMDEN
Are you sure you should have that kind of trust in me? The conversation I’ve been having with my sister tonight has shown you a lot more about me. Enough to make you rethink this whole plan.
ME
I’ve learned nothing I didn’t already know.Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.