SILENT DESIRES

Tess stretched lazily beside the pool. Rhythmic splashing told her without having to look that Dash’s sister was still swimming laps. Elena was a sweet girl. Two years Tess’s junior, she was a lot like Dash in some ways, but more easy going.

She didn’t defer to her brother as if he were a deity and she had no desire to marry a man solely to secure her future. Tess admired and liked her a lot as they had a lot in common.

Smart and independent, Elena had made life in the Black household bearable for Tess. Not that Dash’s mother was unbearable. Quite the opposite. She was kindness itself, but she took the marriage of her son and his girlfriend as a foregone conclusion. Just yesterday she had completely unnerved Tess by insisting she be measured for a wedding gown.

When Tess had mentioned this to Dash, he had merely smiled and complimented his mother on her forward thinking. Evidently, neither he nor his mother had any doubt as to the outcome of Tess’s time with them.

The prospect of a lifetime married to such a confident male was more than daunting, it was scary.

Because Tess wasn’t that confident. She should be. He made his desire to marry her very clear as well as his pleasure in her company. In short, he was doing exactly as he said he would do and courting her.

While he had to work several hours each day, he spent some time each morning and the evenings with her, either taking her out or having his friends come in to meet her.

None of them seemed to find it as odd as she did that he’d chosen a little peahen for his proposed bride rather than a bird of more exotic plumage. But then men of Dash’s income bracket didn’t always consider their wives to be the one for show-off potential. They left that job to their mistresses. Did Dash intend to have a mistress? Did he have one now?

It was a question she had to have answered before she could marry him, but she was afraid to ask. She spent an inordinate amount of time convincing herself she didn’t need to. Sometimes it worked. Why wouldn’t it?

She had a room that resembled a romantic bower because of all the flowers he had given her, but flowers were the least of his offerings to convince her she wanted to marry him. He gave her gifts practically every day. The bikini she was sunbathing in had been yesterday’s present.

He was spoiling her rotten with both time and gifts.

But he said nothing of love and had not kissed her again since her arrival in New York. He had said her virtue was safe, but she had not thought that meant all physical attention would cease.

He avoided touching her which bothered her because she’d come to see that Dash was a tactile man. He hugged his sister frequently, kissed his mother’s cheeks coming and going and was very comfortable, easy going and considerate in his dealing with his friends.

Only she was left out of the magical circle of his affection. Should it be that way when a man wants to marry a woman? While she grew more aware of his physical perfection each day, she worried he had lost interest in her body. Yet, would a man as virile as Dash contemplate marriage to a woman he didn’t want? The answer had to be no.

Unless he planned to have a mistress. But then why get married at all? Her mind spun in now familiar patterns.

“What are you thinking about so hard that you didn’t hear me calling you?” Elena’s voice said

Elena stood above Tess, her beauty vibrant while she toweled the wetness from her long black hair.

Tess sighed. “Guess.”

“My brother.” Elena said.

“Got it in one.”Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

“You are going to marry him, aren’t you?” Unexpected anxiety laced Elena’s voice.

“I don’t know.” Tess replied.

“How can you not know? The man is besotted.” Elena said.

Tess sighed. She was absolutely certain Dash had never said a single word about loving her, or being besotted even.

Elena settled on the lounge next to Tess. “You love him.” She said,

“I’m not saying anything on the grounds it could incriminate me. It’s in the Constitution, you know. Even nosy little sisters can’t bypass fundamental rights.” Tess said playfully.

Elena laughed. “I don’t need you to confirm it. Every time you look at him, you look like you are about to swallow him alive with your eyes. You are too sweet, not to mention deep, to have a simple lust infatuation for my brother. With a woman like you, desire is linked to love or it wouldn’t be there.”

And her desire was obvious to even Dash’s sister. No wonder both Dash and his mother were so sure of her. “A woman like me?” she repeated. What made her so different? “Are you saying you’re capable of wanting a man to make love to you that you don’t love?”

She’d never felt free talking about this sort of stuff with her girlfriends at school. She’d always been too shy, but Elena had steamrolled right over her reticence and they had become confidantes.

Elena giggled. “Maybe not make love, but I have kissed a few.”

Tess’s heart twitched. She could not say the same. She’d hardly ever been kissed and never like Dash kissed her except by him. She’d never wanted it with another man.

“I suppose it must be love.” Tess said finally.

“I knew it.” Elena clapped her hands. “You are going to marry him. Mamma’s sure of it, you know.”

“I know.” Tess said. How could she miss it having been fitted for the wedding gown, for Heaven’s sake?

“She’s just dying for grandbabies.” Elena said.

“What if I don’t want to get pregnant right away?” Tess asked.

“I don’t think Dash would like that,” Elena said candidly, concern in her voice.

Tess secretly agreed. She was becoming more and more convinced that the reason he was considering marriage now, with her, was just to have babies. What other reasons could there be?

“Well, it’s a nonissue at the moment. Your brother hasn’t actually asked me to marry him. We decided to spend some time together for now. Until he does, this is all conjecture.” Tess said.

“Because you’re not sure he’s going to ask or because you’re still trying to convince yourself you don’t know if you’ll say yes?”